I was a creative kid. I loved to draw, color and copy beautiful things. I remember creating a Paint Shop room with all my “abstract” works of art using watercolors, crayons and pens. I remember collecting candy wrappers, stamps, colorful magazine pages and anything that appealed to me, believing that they will become priceless after many years. When I got tired of waiting for their value to soar up, I used them, instead, as stationery to exchange girly notes with my classmates. The magazine pages that piled up were used to decorate my room—a collage of skinny models and beautiful photos to cover the unpainted wall. And speaking of models, my fashion sense was not as bold as the famous designers but I was resourceful enough to brighten up hand me down outfits and make them edgy, trendy, and seemingly pricey.
I didn’t only have an eye for visual arts. My poetry—oh such a pity that I lost the written pieces—told tales of my inspiration, heartaches, rejection, depression, first love, heartbreaks, dreams and aspirations. To heighten the emotions, I believed it was a must to possess a melodramatic streak. If drama is not art, then we won’t enjoy watching stage plays and movies. I neither appeared on TV nor in school plays or summer acting workshops but I had this natural flair to overreact, to make a big fuss over something, to get attention, and to exaggerate things to my advantage. I loved to animate my stories or to dwell and sulk in my misery.
Oh boy did I love to dance. As early as 7 years old, I was already mirroring jazz, ballet and modern dance steps along with rehearsing Japayukis (entertainers who works in Japan). I grew up with professional dancers because our family business back then was to deploy OFWs abroad, including entertainers. I was also known as Dayanara Torres (aka the Dancing Queen) in high school (laugh all you want but that’s true!). To complete my musical inclination, I also took up voice and piano lessons (okay, now I have to kill all of you for telling you this), back in elementary days. My mom was very supportive, hoping that I would become a famous actress when I grow up. But now that I'm all grown up, all I can play on the piano is Do-Re-Mi and my singing performance is limited to videoke sessions with drunken friends and relatives because they’re the only ones who can take the sound of my singing voice.
Even before digital cameras become widely available and selfie was not yet a word, I already organize photo sessions with my cousins. My room will be our photo studio and we will dress up and make up so we can play supermodels for a day. They were fun memories to reminisce.
I have other hidden talents and unharnessed potentials in my youth (didn’t we all?) So where have they all gone to? Well, ADULTING happened.
After college, I got involved too much in finding and keeping a job. I needed to be responsible. I equated seriousness with being responsible. I have been observing my bosses at work, they all exuded an aura of authority and they seemed to be more authoritative and professional when they are serious. That’s no fun! But l thought that fun and partying are for the superficial. Successful professionals are always focused on work, on their desk, reading important documents, presiding executive meetings and always sporting a very formal and professional tone. I thought I would not be taken seriously if they would often hear me laughing like a horse or crying like a drama queen at work. I needed to be serious. Sometimes, I let loose and have fun when the other side of me won over. But as I got deeper into the employment and economic sector, I lost and lost my art.
I can no longer turn back time and go back to the days when I was young and wild and free. But I can try being creative again, no matter how foolish that feels now. Life is too short. I realized, we can’t enjoy life by being serious all the time. A lot of successful and happy people are artistic and creative. Their creative nature actually lead them to success. Leaders who know how to have a good time and balance work and play are in fact well-respected. That’s because they recognize that human resources are not objects and humans have a natural love for beautiful and fun things.
That said, I will try to be creative and artistic again. So in case you find me doing funny faces, doodling on my notes during a meeting, wiggling and swaying with 2 left feet like I’m learning to dance again, or just being silly out of the blue, please understand I’m not losing my mind. I am just trying to find back the art that I have already lost. I urge you to find yours, too.
I didn’t only have an eye for visual arts. My poetry—oh such a pity that I lost the written pieces—told tales of my inspiration, heartaches, rejection, depression, first love, heartbreaks, dreams and aspirations. To heighten the emotions, I believed it was a must to possess a melodramatic streak. If drama is not art, then we won’t enjoy watching stage plays and movies. I neither appeared on TV nor in school plays or summer acting workshops but I had this natural flair to overreact, to make a big fuss over something, to get attention, and to exaggerate things to my advantage. I loved to animate my stories or to dwell and sulk in my misery.
Oh boy did I love to dance. As early as 7 years old, I was already mirroring jazz, ballet and modern dance steps along with rehearsing Japayukis (entertainers who works in Japan). I grew up with professional dancers because our family business back then was to deploy OFWs abroad, including entertainers. I was also known as Dayanara Torres (aka the Dancing Queen) in high school (laugh all you want but that’s true!). To complete my musical inclination, I also took up voice and piano lessons (okay, now I have to kill all of you for telling you this), back in elementary days. My mom was very supportive, hoping that I would become a famous actress when I grow up. But now that I'm all grown up, all I can play on the piano is Do-Re-Mi and my singing performance is limited to videoke sessions with drunken friends and relatives because they’re the only ones who can take the sound of my singing voice.
Even before digital cameras become widely available and selfie was not yet a word, I already organize photo sessions with my cousins. My room will be our photo studio and we will dress up and make up so we can play supermodels for a day. They were fun memories to reminisce.
I have other hidden talents and unharnessed potentials in my youth (didn’t we all?) So where have they all gone to? Well, ADULTING happened.
After college, I got involved too much in finding and keeping a job. I needed to be responsible. I equated seriousness with being responsible. I have been observing my bosses at work, they all exuded an aura of authority and they seemed to be more authoritative and professional when they are serious. That’s no fun! But l thought that fun and partying are for the superficial. Successful professionals are always focused on work, on their desk, reading important documents, presiding executive meetings and always sporting a very formal and professional tone. I thought I would not be taken seriously if they would often hear me laughing like a horse or crying like a drama queen at work. I needed to be serious. Sometimes, I let loose and have fun when the other side of me won over. But as I got deeper into the employment and economic sector, I lost and lost my art.
I can no longer turn back time and go back to the days when I was young and wild and free. But I can try being creative again, no matter how foolish that feels now. Life is too short. I realized, we can’t enjoy life by being serious all the time. A lot of successful and happy people are artistic and creative. Their creative nature actually lead them to success. Leaders who know how to have a good time and balance work and play are in fact well-respected. That’s because they recognize that human resources are not objects and humans have a natural love for beautiful and fun things.
That said, I will try to be creative and artistic again. So in case you find me doing funny faces, doodling on my notes during a meeting, wiggling and swaying with 2 left feet like I’m learning to dance again, or just being silly out of the blue, please understand I’m not losing my mind. I am just trying to find back the art that I have already lost. I urge you to find yours, too.